Compassion…

Question! What is compassion?

It’s a word I use constantly! All the time! I find myself discussing and calling for compassion as often as I use my name . But what is it? How can I claim to stand for something I can’t define?

Have you ever asked someone to just “be honest”? What is that? Can you define this process for you? Ghandi said (and I am paraphrasing terribly), if you ask someone to do something you would never do yourself it is an inhumane act of enslavement.

So, essentially, does that mean that if I ask someone to “be honest” or “be compassionate” and yet I have no understanding of what this even means to me, that is, in fact, an inhumane act?

Huh? How does that work? I find I spin in circles with this one. If I want a world of compassion and non-violence, and yet I am violent. I will “fight for peace!” What?

Anyway.

Compassion? What is it? Definition to come.

xo
Allison

← Older Comments
  • Jade Ruby

    Mario Says:
    “Forget yourself just for a bit”.

    Ah, but that’s the crux isn’t it? As was said over two millennia ago, “That’s like trying to hold smoke in your hands!”

  • Beth

    I agree Jade. In terms of trying to forget yourself, the ‘it’ continues to want what it wants, even when the mind knows better.
    It seems impossible to be selfless ALL the time. Sad but true…although there’s nothing stopping one from attempting to be selfless all the time.

  • choleyd

    Compassion is walking in someone’s life when the world has walked out…

    Honesty is sharing and living the truth to set others free…even yourself.

    -Nichole DiVietro

  • william

    hey allison, nice to hear from you: I think compassion inculdes caring about the suffering of others so that you are moved to take action and help them.
    honesty is always telling the truth, and living truthfully.
    great blog as always
    william

  • Jade Ruby

    Beth,

    The mind will always have it’s conflicts for most of us. But we should make those attempts of becoming the prototype (or Archetype) of what we idealize as a Human Being for ourselves, until the very last breath breathed.

    Being born as a human being gives us that unique opportunity here on Earth to have those conceptions of what perfection may be for us. We can not reach our own idealizations (well most of us anyways), but there it is in our minds as a goal to strive for. Stumble and fall maybe, yet it still is there for us when we pick ourselves up to try again.

    Here in the States as many scream over and over again, “Dollar, dollar bill ya’ll!” Few actually turn that dollar over to see our Great Seal, which is there to remind everyone that material things only bring about a limited amount of self fulfillment. Each time our President steps up to his podium to speak, there it is again to tell us that where there is a promise of peace, there is hope for our tranquility to reach for that goal of Human destiny, sought after lo these thousands of years, in most of Humanity’s cultures.

    Therefore Beth, one can indeed make that attempt at selflessness, mayhaps even catch that elusiveness in a jar.

  • curley247

    I belive compassion is a Deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it.

  • camycats

    HELLO ALLISON…How are you? Hope all is well…first time posting, forgive me if I ramble! :-P

    For weeks now I’ve seen you post this on Twitter, thought it over and over, and wondered how could I answer this one myself? Then today came, September 11th. I think today is a good definition of the word compassion. Just watching the special coverage on TV automatically triggers that emotion in a human being. When you begin to see and feel the sadness in others (through a box), “compassion” is in play, it’s automatic, I think. The dictionary defines compassion as…..”a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.” Pretty elaborate for a word, I think. But I think it could relate to the simple sayings “act of kindness” or “being sympathetic”; all human emotions. I don’t think we as human beings fully understand the truest meanings of certain terms, but we do our best to live by them the way they are defined whether it be from books, our parents or our teachers. And like the sayings go “do unto others…” or “practice what you preach”, most of us live our lives just like that. Yes, from time to time, we forget to be compassionate, we have bad days, but then we take a step back and maybe redefine compassion in our own little way, live it the way we personally think it is defined. What it comes down to is “being a good person, being kind, being true”, the best way we can. As a mother, I have my own personal definition of compassion and that’s pretty much explained above. I don’t know you personally, but from what I read online and can see from your fans, that you seem to be a compassionate person. People who love you and know you personally, KNOW THAT YOU ARE A COMPASSIONATE PERSON. If you believe that you are and are confident that you are, then you won’t have to question it any longer. Good luck to you! :-) <3 Peace & Be Well!

  • camycats

    P.S. Here’s a few different definitions of ANOTHER word that we can probably relate to Compassion —another human emotion, PASSION! (Btw, #s skipped didn’t relate to what you were inquiring about) ;-)

    pas-sion [pash - uh n]
    1. any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate.
    2. strong amorous feeling or desire; love; ardor.

    4. an instance or experience of strong love (or sexual desire).

    6. a strong or extravagant fondness, enthusiasm, or desire for anything: a passion for music.
    7. the object of such a fondness or desire: Accuracy became a passion within him.
    8. an outburst of strong emotion or feeling: He suddenly broke into a passion of bitter words.
    9. violent anger.
    10. the state of being acted upon or affected by something external, esp. something alien to one’s nature or one’s customary behavior (contrasted with action ).

  • Jade Ruby

    camycats Says:
    “Just watching the special coverage on TV automatically triggers that emotion in a human being. When you begin to see and feel the sadness in others (through a box), “compassion” is in play, it’s automatic, I think.”

    There is a thing about attempting to separate the cognitive ability of Human Beings that have not actually been smack dab in a horrible experience; and yet can relate with their own tears, even though they weren’t there personally. To me to have to add-’through a box’ when speaking of something like 9/11 is insulting to the consciousness of the Americans who witnessed that event utilizing the technology of television. As you can witness right now through these mere words, there is a transmission of symbols of communication where we attempt the translation of our subjective thoughts to reach into the brains of others. We can’t all be in the same place at the same time (yet), so we are here trying our best to reach world wide with what we can use.

    Newsworthiness:
    Civil war photographer Mathew B. Brady under fire with a battery before Petersburg, Va., June 21, 1864. Brady, in the foreground, is wearing a straw hat.
    http://preview.tinyurl.com/kmx8y4

  • sarahthelyd

    the most extreme display of compassion that the world will ever witness, is to lay down one’s life for someone else. it’s the greatest form of love, compassion, and sacrifice.

    allison, this is a [potentially embarrassing] long shot, but i want to work with parvati creative inc. “human-centric films as seen through a female lens” … this is my passion, and i’ve done some work for the stage with this as my dictum, but i am so small, my projects reach no further than a small student audience at a coffee shop. or a black box theatre. which is GREAT, of course – sometimes, it’s worth it, if just for that one person who walks away changed. but eventually, i want to be a part of something that touches the world. parvati creative inc. sounds like a great medium for that.

    i’ll gladly talk to you or another agent of communication between us, but please don’t let this fall on deaf ears. like i said, though, i know this is a long shot.

    i look forward to hearing from you. reach me at coolbeanswaco@yahoo.com.

    peace & blessings,
    -sarah

  • Robin

    Thanks for the kind comments Beth.

    I’ve really enjoyed reading so many varied, interesting and compelling view points regarding compassion.
    This topic has really got me thinking about my own interactions with others, about my day to day interaction with each and every person and how I could and in try to work so much harder at just being better at understanding, listening and sharing…

  • Lourens

    The Latin of the word is easy to break down and does give us some insight to its fuller implications. Com-together + Passion-suffering. The word passion does not refer to the modern context of that which I deeply desire. So simply said compassion is to suffer with someone else, to feel the suffering that they feel.

    This does not imply agreeing or disagreeing with someone, but being affected emotionally by their experience and supporting them. In the Bible Job is down and out, and his friends is crapping on him. He accuses them that he needed friends to support and carry him during a difficult time. What their opinions of his circumstances are, are irrelevant.

    Jesus especially showed compassion to people who was down and out, the outcasts of his time, those who could not care for themselves due to cultural stigmas. The Greek word used in the Bible, translated into English as compassion denotes that the whole being of a person is touched, and that ones intestines turned because of it. This is not literal, but denotes the depth of emotion Jesus felt for people in need. He always does something to help those towards whom Jesus feels “compassion” because the depth with which another’s suffering is felt makes it difficult not to, at least for Jesus.

  • Smallvillekent

    Allisons fans sure know compassion.

  • mildmannered

    I think compassion is finding that one thing you really care about.
    That one special thing that means more to you than anything else in the world.
    And when you find her, you fight for her.
    You risk it all, you put her in front of everything, your life, all of it.
    And maybe the stuff you do to help her isn’t so clean.
    You know what? It doesn’t matter.
    Because in your heart you know, that the juice is worth the squeeze.
    that’s what it’s all about.
    :]

  • Lost Soul

    Compassion Is ….
    Love
    Friendship
    Wisdom
    Grief
    Truth
    Heart

    Compassion is a companion of every emotion

    compassion is something thats not limited to people we care about & Love it extends beyond any boundries thats have been made by man ,though Race,Gender,Species compassion extends to all walk’s of life . But mind you compassion is not easy it’s not something we are born with , Compassion is something we gain with time & experience .
    I think R.W. Emerson. say’s it well ,
    “The years teach much which the days never know” & J.A. Froude said “Experience teaches slowly ,and at the cost of mistakes” We all feel compassion every single living creature on this planet , we may not understand it we may not be able to define it ,but non the less compassion is apart of our lives and forever will be, i Hope . But Surpose it’s out of our hands, Cause Time Is The Grand Instructor.

  • adriano henri

    “Compassion is therefore an open unconditional own heart, an unconditional gift of their own energy, so that the other be able to overcome their difficulties”

    Hi Allison, I’m from Brazil, São Paulo, despite living far I love your work, you’re beautiful I love those green eyes that seem two diamonds rare.

    excuse the errors of English.

    kisses.

  • adriano henri

    hi beautiful, when you will come to Brazil so I can introduce you to the wonderful Brazilian paissagens.?

    I asked a wise
    there was a difference between love and friendship.

    He told me this truth:
    Love is more sensitive,
    Friendship safer.

    Love gives us wings,
    Friendship the ground.

    In Love is more caring,
    Friendship in understanding.

    Love is planted
    and lovingly cultivated
    Friendship comes cheek,
    and the exchange of joy and sorrow,
    becomes a great and beloved companion.

    But when the love is sincere
    it comes with great friends,
    and when the friendship is real,
    It is full of love and affection.

    ps. I hope we can be great friends!
    we?

    kisses.

  • http://donthink.net/ kyle

    composure maintain withstand sustain pain
    give take grieve live hope hold help held
    all life once lived taken shaken make
    in dream alive strive thrive we scream
    told sold slaved behaved sleep awake
    eat bathed drink thirst quench staved
    choice made loved stayed only hate
    lathed betrayed heard word begin graved
    lost heart start part soul starved clear
    away near hurt fear there cant bare.

    “compassion”

    something i wrote years ago. i think compassion may be relative to each person’s capacity for selfless giving, along with what volume they can bear of another person’s burden. to ask for honesty and compassion is not inhumane; they are very good things. without understanding exactly what they mean to you, understand that you and whomever you share with may as well be without full understanding or ability to be what these words desire. and fight doesn’t always mean physical or violent; it can be a word for the struggle to achieve something. live for peace.

  • http://ihavearendezvouswithdeath.blogspot.com 7thsomebody

    Compassion: In my opinion it is – to love that which you don’t know or understand. to empathise with a person you may never meet, a person you have no vested interest in. to have your heart pulled in a direction and your pulse rise in relation to someone/something unrelated to you. To put it simply if love is personal then compassion is the feeling mimicked towards that which is not personal

    x7thx

  • Brittany

    Hey Allison!!!! How’s it going???? I hope you are doing well! Compassion for me is to care for others, to be aware of what is happening to people and in what ways we could possibly help. Having the urge or feeling to do something.
    Much love & support,
    Brittany XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

  • camycats

    HELLO ALLISON…..I see you’ve moved on beyond the “definition of compassion” thought. I’m sure you got some pretty good responses from what I’ve read so far (still reading more myself) :-D

    I’m actually writing in to respond on Post #109 Jade Ruby, who hopefully reads this. I did not mean to offend he/she or anyone by saying those few words, honestly. I was merely describing what I was doing, watching the past events of 9/11 on television —which is the word I should have used “TV”. The fact that I was just “watching” it through television was a big impact on me and it did bring back some memories as well. I too, was affected, but I was blessed as well and I thank God for watching over me that day. You see, I’m from New Jersey, I commuted everyday on the PATH train that stopped underneath those towers. That morning I was running late, my husband (fiance at the time) kept calling my cell phone and finally managed to stop me while I was driving already half way to the train station. He told me what was going on, I took the u-turn back home and then turned on the television. To watch everything happening just through my TV (through a box), not being able to reach out and help, not being able to speak to anyone because phone lines were down, wondering what was going on, why is it happening, what am I supposed to do, feeling helpless, watching everyone else in need and not being able to do anything for them myself….That, dear Jade Ruby, is what I was merely trying to explain, that’s all. So, I did not want to offend anyone and I apologize to you again and in advance if there is anyone else out there who misunderstood my words……Peace be with you & Be well!

  • featherywings

    Empathy through action.

  • bwhited1968

    WOW! You really go deep, huh?

    Compassion to me is the lost art of gentleness. It is being able to just for once, set our own needs aside, and concentrate on the needs of another. Being able to really see another’s point of view and allow ourselves to feel their pain and soothe the pain that person, or creature is feeling is compassion.

  • Russgif

    The Collins English Dictionary defines compassion as: a feeling of distress and pity for the suffering or misfortune of another! this I can relate to as my brother was in a coma for a long time and is now brain damaged! I believe I showed/had compassion for my brother, but I also believe that it is something that is shown and not too often talked about (the feeling of compassion). Some people may say that compassion is for the weak, i say it is for the strong! Those certain few people in the world that feel emotions for other people, before concerning themselves with their own life! I think compassion is self giving via emotional thought!!

    I still believe in a world of good versus evil, compassion is one thing that shows the good in people!

    Russgif x

  • hayley33

    To be compassionate, one must first lose their innocence, for one cannot be innocent and compassionate at the same time.

  • samadams

    I don’t know exactly what you would call it, but I think compassion is when you without even thinking about it give your self. There is nothing to stop you from reaching the person you are worried about except things that cannot be helped. It is a feeling that there is nothing else to worry about. I’m sure you show compassion more than you think and don’t even know it whether that definition is right or not.

  • rward9182

    Compassion, is when your eyes and your you heart meet, your eyes are open an see another for who they truly are. From that comes a reaction to others vulnerability and need;you become moved into action.That action is clothed in love and gentleness, a whisper rather than a shout. When a person is compassionate to another they are not higher or greater than the other, but equal.It is the needy serving the needy, because there is not as much separating us from one another as we think.

  • samar

    Hi Allison :)
    hope you are well
    this is my first time writing to you, so i thought i should introduce myself first.
    My name is Samar (pronounced summer) and I am from Pakistan living in Saudi Arabia.
    I have been watching smallville for a while now. I always related to the character of Chloe and admire your portrayal of her very much. So i wondered what you were like in real life. I stumbled upon your blog a while back and was absolutely delighted to see that you share your thoughts with your fans and well wishers.
    I loved reading your entries, i dont feel like a stranger while reading them even though i come from a different part of the world i connect to what your are saying and you seem like a friend i have had a few conversations with before already! :)
    about compassion..
    I believe compassion is understanding with care and respect towards the other.
    you need to be able to put yourself in other people’s shoes to understand why they are the way they are, that connection and your reaction to that connection, of how you help and care for the other person, is compassion. ( isn’t that ironic with all the suicide bombing going on at my side of the world?! and let me say that’s a great example of the LACK of compassion!)
    About honesty..
    I think honesty has a deep connection with truth. Being honest to yourself is actually facing the truth yourself and being honest to others by telling it or acting upon it. If you have two faces, one for the world and one for yourself then you are neither being honest to others nor to yourself.
    understanding is necessary in order to act on both compassion and honesty.
    sometimes both things can be painful and in order to escape that pain or inconvenience people disregard them selfishly.
    It is unfortunate that in the world of today when everything is so easy and accessible, and the world getting smaller, people are less compassionate and less honest than they used to be.. is it because boundaries are easier to cross, there are less limits, less privacy more competition, less respect?..
    I believe it does all come down to you as an individual.
    what Gandhi said is quite true.
    If you expect others to do what you don’t want to do, then there’s no equality amongst you.. and that’s discrimination which is inhumane, its like looking down at people, that would be a kind of enslavement wouldn’t it?
    i hope this helped :|
    because i am not good with words, i am actually more of a visualizer :D
    anyway lots of best wishes
    say hello to Tom welling from me! :D
    I find the concept of superman very interesting if you look at it philosophically. but that’s a discussion in itself so ill leave that for some other day!

    take care! :)
    samar

  • samar

    oh .. also id like you to check this out
    http://charterforcompassion.org/
    its a really nice effort for equality and peace! :)

  • dowajo

    I can understand showing compassion. There are a lot of suffering people out there. But it won’t change unless we change our mentality. Egalitarian relationships. That’s a start

  • http://www.myspace.com/_dream_walker Dream_Walker

    As once quoted here…. “Compassion is the emotional glue that keeps you rooted in the universality of the human experience, as it connects you to your essence and to the essence of those around you. It is the act of opening your heart”
    I find this quote to sum it all up the best. All i can add is compassion to me is the act of sharing and caring about others, without any remorse or selfbenefit, the need to help and be helped. I find it to be one of THE most important things that makes “Humanity” as such… :) Cheers,DW

  • WhoisWorthyToAknowledge

    Pain….all i can say is no person who hasnt even experienced pain to begin with can truly understand someone elses pain,

    even a foolish selfish person with no compassion can come to understand others pain/hurting once they know what pain is,

    those who experienced pain grow and mature faster than anyone else ever could.

  • http://www.socalmusicproductions.com mjones

    Ghandi is superbly proper in this discussion. He was the ultimate..

    Compassion as i’ve come to learn is the complete and utter surrender to a cause greater than ourselves. A sacred act of humankind which reminds us of our capability, our potential, and our love. Our humanity.

    Ghandi meant to for us to lead ourselves away from manipulation and control, which is a form of enslavement. Remember, “we must be the change we wish to see in the world”.

    Great topic :)

  • WhoisWorthyToAknowledge

    whoops i left one thing out after the last line in my comment above i forgot to add:

    and are also capable of more compassion
    for people aswell.

    Your character in smallville is awsome
    very unpredictable i think keep up the good work!!!

  • http://dr.house.over-blog.fr estrellangelica

    hi Allison! New here, I have to say I’m positively surprised and delighted to discover so interesting topics.
    If you want to enjoy life, and by that I mean understand it, this is the kind of questions we should all ask to ourselves at some points. So thanks for giving me this opportunity… I really like that kind of interrogations.
    So, compassion? Without a dictionary of course, because this is simply not the way -to pick up some “all ready sentences”-, I would first have in mind that compassion implies to see anyone with a pure sentiment, without judging, accepting his differences and style of life without negative thoughts. In a higher level, it would imply a deeply caring feeling toward any living thing and to be able, without restraint, to give yourself in order to improve the world sufferings. “Compassion” for me is totally different than “pity” feelings, even if it can imply that at a low level. I think to reach the state of “pure” compassion, you have to be in peace with yourself, to feel complete and the best of you ; only then, you are really able to compassionate about misfortunes of the world and suffer from each one of them.

    Thanks again. Hoping next topics like this!
    Take care. Estelle

  • dowajo

    if you want to understand Gandhi better, listen to Giselle the supermodel on YouTube. if you want to appreciate Catherine Keener a bit more, watch some Tim Allen on Home Improvement also on YouTube

  • thehumanscorch

    =Compassion= is when you can feel another’s pain. That feeling then draws you into a state of empathy, and you become moved to try and help alleviate your now shared pain, in the name of love.

  • Lea

    Hi Allison

    I just saw your blog and found it very interesting, here is what i think:

    Compassion: I see you, I hear you, I understand you, I feel sorry for you, I want to help you … That’s what compassion is – to understand someone’s state of mind…. but sometimes you might disagree and it is at that very moment you are being Honest ;o)

  • http://www.danimftinv.com dani

    Compassion: accepting people for who they are no matter what. Trying to live like Jesus…accepting the prostitutes, the tax collectors ect. Compassion is knowing that no one is perfect and giving acceptance when we are tempted otherwise. We are all called to be compassionate every day even in the smallest of ways. We are all capable of stopping the stone from being thrown it is having the courage to say stop is where compassion lies.

  • Daniel_K

    Compassion is the ability to forgive someone for something you could not forgive yourself for doing. For excepting every flaw and misstep. For loving when others would not and doing so without second guessing.

  • brooke54200

    La compassion est le sentiment par lequel on est porté à percevoir ou ressentir la souffrance des autres, et poussé à y remédier. « je souffre avec ». J’ai beaucoup de compassion pour les gens mais seulement pour les gens qui le méritent. Par example quand je vois une pauvre femme avec ses enfants dans la rue j’ai de la compassion après tout cela peut arriver à tout le monde!! Mais pour certains autres que je repère très facilement qui font les sans domicile fixe dehors alors qu’à la fin de la journée tu les voient sortirent une voiture que peu de gens peuvent s’offrir d’un garage ça sa me mets en colère

  • brooke54200

    Sorry i repost my comment because i’ve written in french!!
    Compassion is the feeling by which we are led to perceive or feel the suffering of others, and pushed to remedy. “I suffer with.” I have great compassion for people but only people who deserve it. For example when I see a poor woman with her children in the street I have compassion after all that can happen to anyone! But for some others I spotted very easily which are homeless outside while at the end of the day you see them out a car that few people can afford a garage that’s me angry

  • Angel

    Compassion ????
    (Hebrew)rachu?m,ra?cham

    There are three Greek words that are typically used to express compassion and here are their definitions…
    1.splagchnizomai-to be moved in the dept of your being.
    2.eleeo?-to have mercy upon
    3.oikteiro?-to have pity

    Once you see where the word compassion comes from or how it was used in older languages then the pieces of the puzzle seem to come together. You are right Allison, it is a little confusing to know what this word means because it is so often over used that you lose sight of the true depth of what this word means but I thank you because your post made me think of things that I had forgotten. These 3 Greek words are used to actually comprise the act of comassion…it is being moved emotionally within the depth of your being in ways of mercy and pity. It is to almost feel the actual pain of those whom are suffering. It means that when someone is hurting I will hurt with them until their hurt is gone, I will stand with them, I will cry with them and I will suffer with them. I will lend them my strength in their weekness and I will fight for those that cannot fight for themselves. Compassion is saying to yourself that I will withstand the insults that are thrown at me and the abuse is given me for I know that the actions of those who do so are born out of the hurt that has been relentlessly been thrown on them so many times in the past. When I have the power and the right to take vengence upon those whom have done me wrong….I will seek to understand them and give them love instead. And to the brokenhearted I give compassion in the form of pity as I just walk with them in their sorrows for I know that only time will heal their wounds. An amazing word that when put into action can change a life which if done enough can change a world.

    A quote by Frederick Buechner:
    Compassion is sometimes the fatal capacity for feeling what it is like to live inside somebody else’s skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy finally for you too.

    Simply a messenger

    Angel

  • theforgotten

    Compassion
      

    Whisper of surrender
     Broken and whole switch role
     
    Miracle spark’d
    Redemption’s echo
    Reflection language
     
     
    Heart harmony
     Rhythm’s reason
    Journey’s melody
    Woven season
     
     
    Love’s child
     
    Honesty’s answer
     
    Truth’s smile
     
    Guilt’s mask
     
    Conviction’s blood
     
     
     
     
     
    sumpatheo?

  • jkdorio

    Allsion Mack! Compassion means you’d do anything for the person you have it for. It means that when you think about that person, you feel like nothing else in the world matters!

  • kalvin

    a little late for a reply but what the heck, i’ll give it a shot.

    Compassion for me, is an unconditional love or care for someone. No matter how different you may be from him/her. It bridges the gap and sets aside all the imperfections. It knows no boundaries and it seeks no reward.

    ^_^.

  • TUV

    Be yourself as you like to be treated, treat others the same way they treat you. ;)

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