Do you ever feel like you are chasing your tail? Like you are repeating yourself over and over and over again, without actually getting anywhere? I feel like that right now.

Like, I know what I want and where I want to go, but to actually take the next step seems colossal, so I stay chasing my tail, spinning in circles and wearing a hole in the ground because I can’t seem to spin anywhere else.

It is feeling inspired and frozen at the same time; feeling the need to sprint with my feet super glued to the starting blocks. Am I alone with this?

xo
allison

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Add yours Comments – 121

  • David Hayes

    on October 2, 2008 at 8:29 pm

    Leave the spinning to experst!

    YouTube

    watch?v=2cVuDDBqljM

  • Stephanie P

    on October 2, 2008 at 8:50 pm

    I know what you mean. Its like I know what I want to do with my life, and Im trying to do it but at the same time Im second guessing myself. Its kinda like your at the bottom of a set of stairs, and what you want is at the top, and you know you want it but for ever two steps you take up the stairs, you always take one back.

  • kadosho

    on October 2, 2008 at 10:08 pm

    Been feeling like this for a long time. As of late, its been some family emergency (;-; a few winding up in the hospital for awhile). Its been some of the craziest times this month alone..

    As far as life so far, its still just getting through “that door”. I want to get through it, but there are so many barriers. Although I do get this feeling, an opportunity is coming.

    Maybe I am scared of doing something like this alone?

  • Jade Ruby

    on October 2, 2008 at 10:37 pm

    No Allison, you are not alone. Thanks to your blog, what used to be more distant and intangible has become more immediate. Sensitivity, leadership, initiative, negotiation. Finding the balance may never be easy for some; however, the intangible of us basking in the magnificent warmth of your presence can never be underestimated. Thank you so much Allison for being. . .
    you.

  • Andrea

    on October 2, 2008 at 10:40 pm

    I dont think you are alone in this at all really. =)

    There are so many things I want from life…and so many goals, and yet half of the time I find myself standing still.

    I think that has to do with my fear of the unknown. It’s easy to say I want this…or that…but actually leaving the comfort of my day to day life and truly branching out in a new adventure scares the hell out of me. So I end up chasing my tail…and finding content in what I have.

    In a lot of cases, I’m confused about what the best move for me is. Some days I want to drop out of college…and do something radical like join the peace core. But then I know the time I’m invested into school will have it’s pay off one day. Then other instances I know it’s time for a change…but I just cant seem to figure out how to go about it. Or if by some miracle I do know the next step…is it worth the risk of leaving what I’ve already built for myself?

    It seems to be the way people (or atleast I) function. It’s about weighing our options and deciding where to go from there, and having the courage to take a step out of the little circle in the ground.

  • taylor nikole

    on October 2, 2008 at 11:21 pm

    OH MY GOSH
    sarah palin drives me insane 🙁
    just thought id share.
    She used ‘heck of alota” in her VP debate…
    go her

    ehh sorry, im just scared of how this presidential election is going to turn out
    :-/

  • taylor nikole

    on October 3, 2008 at 12:28 am

    ahh and i was reading my text book today for history…
    and there was a big question in blue that asked
    “What do we learn from art?”
    I read the subsections… and there was no discussion or ‘answer’ to the question.
    How cool and so random!
    It kinda just made my mind veer in class and just think and think about it.
    My mind was running at a billion thoughts a minute.. trying to put pieces of art together in my head.. and try to see what it taught me 🙂

  • Scott

    on October 3, 2008 at 3:24 am

    Allison.

    Everyone here, really.

    I am going to share some of my long-time favorite songs and lyrics to them because I am drawn to do so here. I would normally feel awkward about giving you links to full songs uploaded to youtube, I’m not so concerned at the moment. I’m only giving the name of the site then the extension because for some reason having links doesn’t work anymore… sorry if the last time I did that caused problems.

    “Pray” from the Final Fantasy: Pray soundtrack
    Youtube /watch?v=gM1C1-ekTI8
    Lyrics: fflyrics /ffpray.html#p

    “The Dream Within” by Lara Fabian
    Youtube /watch?v=LJINX_lROTI
    Lyrics: fflyrics /fftsw.html#tdw

    “Love Will Grow” from the Final Fantasy: Love Will Grow soundtrack
    Youtube /watch?v=fJUBPa1qrAQ
    Lyrics: fflyrics /fflwg.html#lwg

    “Somnia Memorias” from the Parasite Eve soundtrack
    Youtube /watch?v=83-1RU1V5Nk
    Lyrics: fflyrics /pe.html#sm

    There are a lot of great songs within the soundtracks themselves as well. The two Final Fantasy ones have a variety of English, Japanese, Spanish and French lyrics to the songs.

    I think I was inspired to post them because of your goal toward inspiring humanity and looking to the whole world rather than only certain segments. I have many songs in this vein in my collection, yet these seemed meaningful to post here.

  • Vegas911

    on October 3, 2008 at 7:02 am

    Man, I know what you are saying!!! I feel like I am insane…you know the kind where you keep repeating the same actions over and over but expect a different result?? I have got about 10 holes that I have dug in my life chasing my own tail…..When I finally get out of that hole I just ware a new one….is a cycle that I would gladly break…if I had the first clue as to how!

  • Neil

    on October 3, 2008 at 11:15 am

    I’ve learned something during my time in sales. The definition of “insanity” is doing the same things over and over and expecting a different result. If something doesn’t work for you anymore, make some changes that might get better results.

  • Sally

    on October 3, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    OMG! Allison. I know exactly how you feel. I feel the same way right now. Like I know what I want to do and where I want to end up but all of the small things I’m supposed to do to get there makes me feel like I’m going in circles doing the same things over and over and getting no where. It’s nice to see there are other people out there who feel the same way.

  • Spiritman

    on October 3, 2008 at 5:10 pm

    I was going to leave another one of my very long posts but I saw that David Hayes said a lot of what I was thinking. I have rarely seen another person that is really so NOT stuck. You are evolving at a tremendous rate, girl! But I think that I understand your feeling. There is an awareness in you that’s coming to the forefront of what you CAN become. And I think you want to experience a lot of that right NOW. Join the club. But be patient. Most of us would give our eye teeth to be where you are now and have the unique opportunities that are laid out like a long red carpet in front of you. And that carpet is strewn with precious diamonds for you. But even those precious jewels are small and dull compared to the jewel you are becoming. You are just becoming very sensitized to your seeming limitations. My friend, your smile alone can heal a lot of hearts in this world. You vastly underestimate your power right now, let alone the power of where you’re headed. There is SO much love around you, so many of what some may call angels. Just listen… and then go out and light up the darkened places with your smile, with your compassion. You already have enough of the tools. First rule: Giving and receiving are exactly the same thing. The more you offer from your heart, the more you will get of what you are looking for. How much love is coming to you right NOW? Feel it. Use it. Become it. You fill MY heart just thinking about you.

  • Kathy-Lynn Brown

    on October 3, 2008 at 7:53 pm

    I am so with you on this. Every since I was a little girl I have wanted to become a writer. I love movies and the whole concept that surrounds them. I have the talent and I know that the good Lord above gave it to me to share with the world. To tell stories for the world to read or watch to take them from their mundane lives to some where that can touch their hearts or make them laugh. I have plenty of ideals and have started so many movies, my only problem is that I can’t seem to make myself sit down and finish one before I start the other. I know what I want to help from the beginning to the end. I just can’t seem to get there. I know what steps I need to take to make my dreams and goals come true, but it’s seems like a task I can’t complete. My husband always tells me that my work is great and should be shared with the world, why is it that its so hard for me to put on my shoes and take that next step?

  • Kathy-Lynn Brown

    on October 3, 2008 at 7:55 pm

    I am so with you on this. Every since I was a little girl I have wanted to become a writer. I love movies and the whole concept that surrounds them. I have the talent and I know that the good Lord above gave it to me to share with the world. To tell stories for the world to read or watch to take them from their mundane lives to some where that can touch their hearts or make them laugh. I have plenty of ideals and have started so many movies, my only problem is that I can’t seem to make myself sit down and finish one before I start the other. I know what I want to happen from the beginning to the end. I just can’t seem to get there. I know what steps I need to take to make my dreams and goals come true, but it’s seems like a task I can’t complete. My husband always tells me that my work is great and should be shared with the world, why is it that its so hard for me to put on my shoes and take that next step?

  • Michael Coco

    on October 6, 2008 at 9:09 pm

    You are not alone in that feeling allison…i feel that way everyday…but i do see the light at the end of the tunnel

  • Alasdair

    on October 12, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    I check into your blog from time to time and just read this post.
    It spoke to me as if I was listening to the voice within. As you can see from the 115 posts before me (I hope you read this far down) you are definately not alone in this feeling although I know it feels as if you are.
    I’ve been stuck in this state of being for so long now I can’t see an alternitive
    I hope you’ve found your way out Allison!!

  • Ruth

    on October 15, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    ‘It is feeling inspired and frozen at the same time; feeling the need to sprint with my feet super glued to the starting blocks.’

    Perfect way to put it. Never alone. As much as we feel alone at times, we are never truly alone. The world is full of kindreds. The only way to live with peace in these stagnant times is to embrace life for what it is, living fully in the moment, loving “what is.” Everything you go through is exactly what you need to grow through. Embrace it with gratitude and grow! You are a radiant soul on a human journey…live it fully with grace and wisdom…and laughter.

    love love love and peace….

  • Tressa Bailey

    on October 22, 2008 at 3:02 pm

    I’m one of your over-aged fans, been reading you for a while. You seem like you really care about people and things, too much if that is possible. All I can tell you is that I have often felt the way you do, every change brings trepidation and excitement. At 46 I’m still glued but running. It feels good now. Pity those who don’t feel that way.

    Best of luck to you young friend.

  • Adrian P

    on October 22, 2008 at 11:36 pm

    i know it’s an old entry but had to post. i mean this happens to me all the time (and i know it does to many more people).

    well since a little kid i’ve always wanned to be an actor, an since my mother is an artist too i thought this was easy, but i hasn’t been… for the past few years i’ve been trying to see how to stop this circle of no doing anything (since here the problem is that they don’t take to much care in art and i don’t know any actting school or anything (venezuela ) ), but after readding one of your posts the other day about the ‘VFS (vancouver film school), i did my research and i really love the place and the thing the offer (and the kind of people that come out form there), so i asked a few questions, but since i’m studing a career here and don’t have money to move to canada yet (and living there was always been my dream so), i think i’ll have to be patient, but at least now i found something so am happy lets hope i won’t be spinning in circles again.

    and i hope you get out of your circle too, i’m here to support 😛

  • Jenn

    on November 3, 2008 at 9:26 pm

    To answer your question. Yes. A lot of us feel like that. I find that I used to stay stationary and “talk” a lot but never “do”. Then I decided one day that I wanted more out of life than that. I think it’s because we are comfortable staying in that little hole. It’s safe and wonderful. But you are going to outgrow that hole whether you want to or not, because it is the human experience to grow and expand. You will be afraid because it means so much to you and the outcome is sometimes uncertain. But embrace the opportunity to continue your spiritual journey. Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.(I am not sure who’s quote that is, but I carry it close to my heart) So be prepared to be scared. Jump right in because that means you are on the right path to what’s important to you! Happy trails!

  • Beth

    on December 29, 2008 at 7:03 pm

    I understand exactly what you mean. I feel like I could’ve written those words myself.