A request of pride

allison, i would like you, if you can and dont mind, is do a session on pride. you may have already done it because ive only started doing comments for like a month but anyway i mean like ask people what makes them proud and stuff please. if you read this i would appreciate a chat about it please.

😀 JONNY

So this was a message requesting a post on pride. Here it goes.  When I think of pride, several things come to mind. One is my ego, that damn image I have of myself that I always seem to bring up when I need an excuse not to do things that scare or intimidate me.

Actually, let’s focus on that pride for this posting, then tomorrow we can explore further!

As some of you may know, I am directing this season. I was let off the hook last season due to the writer’s strike, but now this season it is back on again. And now I have no excuses. This is an opportunity I can’t pass up and yet every time I think about the process I feel as though I am going to throw up.

It’s that image, that pride, rearing it’s head and I feel like thwarting that character I believe I am in my day to day life is a fate worse than death. Facing failure and testing my pride– hell, even proving my believe in myself wrong, is like the scariest thing in the world to me. But if this is something I never test, if I walk through my life believing that I can do things I have never in fact tried or tested, how strong and confident will that pride really be.

One slip and the whole thing is torn apart.

It is my belief that the only way to build a foundation of self that is substantial, that won’t crumble at the first sight of questioning or failure, is to, in fact, fail. And then learn how to put the pieces back together from beginning to end. Then you truly understand how the curves and crevices fit and you have no fear of it falling to pieces again, cause you know it is no big thing to re-lay the concrete.

But man getting over that initial sense of fake self-confidence is a doozy.

More on this tomorrow

xo
allison

oh and by the way, my sites gonna be down for a few hours tonight and tomorrow due to some reconstruction! I’m redecorating! Fun!

Add yours Comments – 35

  • tabby chapman

    on August 1, 2008 at 11:23 pm

    HAHA funny to me how the previous entry was about prejudice and this one, pride. I love that book! *g*

    Good luck directing Alli! I hope you fail a LOT before you actually go in! hehe.

  • Le Amazing Mari

    on August 1, 2008 at 11:28 pm

    For some reason I thought you were gonna talk about gay pride.

    I make myself giggle.

  • Denise

    on August 1, 2008 at 11:37 pm

    YAY to redecorating!!!

  • Matthew

    on August 1, 2008 at 11:38 pm

    Pride is a hard topic to dicuss…no matter how many times you fail we cant seem to get over it..i think your explanation of pride is great and hope to hear more tomorrow..it would be really cool if u gave examles when u talk about it..that would be swell..so pride for me, personally, is difficult to get over..i cant seem to get the picture in my head that i could fail miserably every day, hour, or even second..as soon as we get over the failure that always comes with pride we can accomplish so much more in life..without fear of failure imagine what the world could be like..well look foward to tommorow..thanks for the blog.
    bye

  • Denise

    on August 1, 2008 at 11:39 pm

    Good luck directing, im sure youll do great 🙂

  • Allie

    on August 2, 2008 at 12:21 am

    Lol, I totally saw the pride and prejudice thing and cracked up too Tabby! 😀 (I just watched the 6 hour BBC version with my sisters…and then followed it up by all three of the Lord of the Rings movies….Now THAT was quite the movie marathon….Lol)

    But anywho, back to the blog,
    I know EXACTLY what you mean about pride. I hate failure, and I fear it so much because I don’t want people to know when I fail. It scares the crap out of me to let people see my flaws. For instance, I’m nineteen years old and I still don’t have my drivers license. Why? Because I have failed the test three times already and I am PETRIFIED of taking it again because I feel like if I fail it a fourth time I would never be able to face anybody ever again, let alone myself. I get that same sick to my stomach feeling that you mentioned when you think about directing. But in the end by being prideful and letting the fear of failure take over, I’m not helping myself. By not facing it I’m only hurting myself. I’m taking away a chance for freedoms by not trying again. But even if I realize that I’m only hurting myself my mind can come up with a hundred scenarios about what people might do if I fail….including one where they throw blue-raspberry slushies at me….which I realize is ridiculous, but the fear is taking over. I need to get it through my head that people are never as mean or cold as I make them out to be, and most of them only want to see me happy and aren’t going to deliberately laugh and jeer at my failures.

    And really failing a driver’s test really isn’t the worst thing that can happen in life. (I mean for goodness sake…there are a lot worse things that could happen) I can try as many times as I like. But not everything in life is that way. But even so, you’re right, even if we fail without a second chance, there are things that we can learn, and build on from it to make us ready to take on to whatever challenge life throws at us next. It’s a matter of swallowing our pride, facing the fear again and again until we learn how we can beat it. “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” -Nelson Mandella

    Lol….wow, it is SO easy to say all of this and convince myself that it’s no big deal and I can fail without fear, but it’s another thing entirely to actually do it…Well here’s hoping that I manage to put this idea into practice!!!!

    Anywho, hope that you’re having a good week and I’m super excited for the redecorating! lol 😀
    -Allie

  • Asim Ramay

    on August 2, 2008 at 1:14 am

    hmm in the last post (prejudice) i wrote even more then Alison so i’ll keep it short cause other wise i’ll think to much into it and be typing for another half hour,

    Pride is really bad thing in my view as it makes your self image better then it is thus making you afraid of failing, but that doesn’t mean your not allowed to succeed just that when you do you should think it wasn’t cause of me i succeeded but because everyone helped me to succeeded so that you don’t have pride, and it will allow you to do more then you ever thought because you won’t have the pride that makes you afraid of failure.

    i mean your directing the next season but you have experienced people you can ask for advice such as the usual directors and there’s also Tom Welling you can ask for advice as well cause he did a pretty good job of directing Apocalypse, Hydro and Fragile

    P.S.
    can’t wait for your take on Smallville hope you do well :D,
    😛 it ended up thinking to deeply into it anyway 😛 Sigh 😛

    Eating Ferrero Rocher ( a very nice chocolate in case you don’t know what it is) and wishing i could give you one (seriously),
    Asim

  • Asim Ramay

    on August 2, 2008 at 1:50 am

    P.S.S – sorry for double posting-
    i really think you should add a edit button for the posts becuase for both my posts i spelt ur name wrong with one L instead of 2 L’s 😛 lol + then i would not have 2 double post and i could fix spelling errors and stuff

  • Gaia

    on August 2, 2008 at 2:10 am

    I’m looking forward to see the 8 season but I’m going to cry if you and Clark won’t be friends anymore… What do you say? Please answer 😀 I love your charater on Smallvile!

  • Nicholas

    on August 2, 2008 at 2:46 am

    I don’t think pride is about failure. I think pride is about doing what you feel is right and not doubting it for a second. Worrying about how something turns out has nothing to do with pride; it has to do with shame. People will feel shame if they do something and it doesn’t turn out the way they hoped or if others don’t see it as a success.

    If someone takes pride in something they do… the outcome won’t matter. Taking pride in something means you didn’t comprimise your views; you don’t worry about what people think of it because you took great pride in making it. That is the way I look at it.

  • SmallvilleRulz

    on August 2, 2008 at 2:58 am

    chloe is awesome, smallville is awesome i watched the episode today tomb, its my favourite, anyways u do an AWESOME job in that episode, but u do a great job in most episodes

  • Lydia

    on August 2, 2008 at 3:09 am

    I think that you can be proud of yourself, simply when you try. No matter what the outcome is, you can be proud when you’ve decided to tackle something that intimidates you or when you try to learn something new etc. You may also be proude of yourself when you admit to errors or that you’ve been wrong etc.
    Learning by trial and error is necessary in working towards a better self on your journey.

    At this moment, I’m proud of myself of taking action to make a dream come true. I’m terrified to step out of my comfort zone but, I’m also very excited to travel and stay for a week in Vancouver, all by myself.

    I’m looking forward to seeing your work as a director and I’m sure it’s going to be a very enriching and fun experience for you.

    I’m curious to see the new lay-out.

    Have a joyful weekend.

  • Ivy

    on August 2, 2008 at 3:17 am

    Im amazed how “pride” is so much associated with failure? When i think of pride, I think of accomplishments.

    It’s so easy to knock ourselves down. But I dont think many people know how tough and strong they can be when and if they want to.

    Can’t wait for the “new look” Allison! Have fun!!! 🙂
    Tah for now! Take care you all!

  • Ivy

    on August 2, 2008 at 3:25 am

    …and oh by the way Allie, I failed my driving test 3x..Passed on the 4th. Believe me, after one year of driving you’d look back ,smile (or even laugh) and wonder, what was the fuss all about?
    P.s. This might help…on the actual driving test, stop thinking about OTHER people…remember you’re not doing this for them..You’re doing this for yourself 🙂
    Best of Luck! …can we have some sort of celebration when you pass?? 😉
    Tah,
    Ivy

  • Ivy

    on August 2, 2008 at 4:40 am

    p.s..p.s…p.s..
    Allison- I know in my heart you’ll do a brilliant job directing!!! I mean, how hard could it be?;) 🙂 Ha.ha.ha.

  • The Friday Philosopher

    on August 2, 2008 at 5:03 am

    The fear of failure is fruitless. Most people fear it because of what others may think of them when it occurs, and it will occur! Like I said yesterday, nobody is perfect, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t try to better ourselves.

    For me, failure goes part and parcel with accomplishment, if everything we did worked the first time we did it, we wouldn’t see a need to improve. For example, caves once kept us warm and dry, so why bother building mud huts or progressing from there to stone houses and so on? We all strive to better ourselves, whether we know it or not. It’s the reason we worked hard through school and college, it’s the reason that we work hard everyday in the work place, for the promotion; that corner office with a view.

    This form of pride is beneficial to us all, without it we wouldn’t be talking on this site! If Konrad Zuse had said,

    “I’ve created the worlds only Programmable computer, admittedly it’s the size of a house, but I’m happy with that. Now, what time does the bar open?”

    We would all still be using the 1938 Z1. He would never have seen a need to progress; we would not have had the Z2, Z3 or even computer programming language. Some might say this is a good thing, but my life’s work operates around my computers so I would have to disagree!

    Pride is a good thing. It is one of the driving forces behind progress, which in some people’s opinion is the key to survival. If Konrad Zuse hadn’t sort to improve on the designs of Charles Babbage, or if the human race as a whole hadn’t seen the need to improve we would still be living in the dark ages.

    So don’t fear failure, instead fear, fear itself. For fear is the only obstacle in the way of progression!

    Friday

    P.S. I can’t wait to see the new design.

  • Elizabeth M

    on August 2, 2008 at 5:04 am

    Pride and Prejudice – HA HA Fantastic though BBC version is the BEST EVER!

    Anyway……being proud of myself is something I struggle with. I get embarassed about it. I think a lot of it stems from school, where I got a lot of attention for being clever. This didn’t sit well with my classmates.
    So whenever I achieved good marks I started to hide it, and in a away hid my own pride.
    Having pride in yourself is an important thing to have and I have come round to accepting that yes “I am good at some things and there is nothing wrong with that”

    For me though the best sort of pride, is the pride you have in others.
    My cousin who is like my brother (we are 11months apart and pretty much grew up together) works in the same company as me. I went straight in as management and he started 6 years prior to me at entry level. Since I joined its spurred him on to want to be a manager. He is now doing that and doing such a great job. I have an overwhelming sense of pride when I hear senior managers talking about him in such high regard.
    I also have pride for my own brother who after a few years of finding his way has a job where he takes care of disabled and elderly. He loves his job, and they all love him. The satisfaction of that is an amazing feeling for me.
    I have pride in my friends and family, and subsquesntly I feel pride for myself. These people I surround myself with are amazing people and I think to myself, “god I must be alright for these people to want to spend time with me”
    So there we go…PRIDE we all have it, but sometimes we are just scared to show it….but don’t be. We are all great at something and deservedly so.

    Liz x

  • Kyle

    on August 2, 2008 at 9:22 pm

    Pride — very interesting word. For some reason “Pride” holds a negative connotation to me; but “pride” has to be examined in context.

    I think there is a fine line between self-esteem and pride. People need to be confident and feel valued in life, but its wrong when that feeling starts to dominate over other people.

    Usually, that kind of pride almost always results in destruction. I find it better to admit your fears, concerns, inhibitions — then there’s nowhere to go but up; and that might just be the key in cultivating true confidence in life.

    -Ky

  • David Hayes

    on August 2, 2008 at 10:22 pm

    You won’t have to worry about pride too much longer because I’ve always heard that “Pride goeth before the Fall” … and summer is almost over.

  • Kris

    on August 2, 2008 at 11:21 pm

    I love that you touch on this aspect of pride. It’s not the excuse many people use, but it’s a big reason for avoiding risks, regardless of your profession.

    The flip side is that the things we’re most proud of accomplishing are the ones where we could have failed spectacularly. It’s those odd mixes of fate and talent and hard work that birth the benchmarks of our lives.

    I wish you luck, and courage, and just enough fear to work both harder *and* smarter. You’ve got the creative talent, and I have yet to meet a Leo who isn’t a natural leader, even when they’re subtle about it. I look forward to seeing your work!

  • Ron St.Amant

    on August 3, 2008 at 2:52 am

    I think the fear you have is normal, natural, and actually quite positive. It will help to keep you focused (at least for me it does). You have and will have so much support from your friends and peers and your fans. My brother-in-law is a director so I know the sorts of stress and creative tension that you’ll face…but talent and inspiration will win out. In our house, we can’t wait to read “Directed by Allison Mack” on the screen 🙂

  • Eddie

    on August 3, 2008 at 5:28 am

    My advice….don’t think about it…or ponder it…or think of the 100 different things that you could screw up directing. Just do it. Learn from it. Enjoy the fact that once it’s done you accomplished something that you have been avoiding. You will do fine 🙂

  • jonny

    on August 3, 2008 at 5:51 am

    thankyou very much allison i appreciate this a lot.

    I LOVE YoU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Jennifer

    on August 3, 2008 at 7:07 am

    Good Luck directing Allison. Your going to do great. You alway’s shine in no matter what you do. =)

  • gaL

    on August 3, 2008 at 8:07 am

    PRIDE..

    in my head i always say that pride is like alcohol .. too much is not good for you .. and makes you think youre always right and most of the time a burden to other people ..

  • Ana C.

    on August 3, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    Well first off I’d like to wish you good luck on directing this season! I can’t wait to see that episode!

    Now Pride. I think my mind goes to think about ego as well. What makes me feel pride? I think every time I set a goal and accomplish it. Since it’s something I’ve fulfilled for myself then pride blossoms and not only that but the approval of my parents.
    My family. My heritage. Oh my heritage is always something I get incredibly prideful about. I was born and sorta raised in Mexico till I was about seven so now being in another country most of my life I still take my heritage into account and that’s more pride in me.

    Well I dunno if I’m making sense, haha. I don’t always go around throwing what’s in my mind into words. But your entries have become incredibly inspirational and have made my brain start working in ways I never really got into before 🙂

  • Smallvillekent

    on August 3, 2008 at 3:28 pm

    Hi Allison,
    What you are feeling is natural, the fear of something new. I know that feeling, but it goes away. You are a great actress and I know the episode you are directing will be one of Smallville’s BEST. Good Luck Peter

  • Gilles Belanger

    on August 3, 2008 at 7:21 pm

    hey allison.. im sure u will do great for the smallville episode that ur gonna be directing. im looking forward to seeing ur episode. tom welling and michael rosenbaum got a chanse to be in ther director seat and im glad your getting the chance. im sure u’ll do great because with alice & huck and also u are a great actress. so good luck. we all believe in you 🙂

    Gilles xo 🙂

  • Brittany

    on August 3, 2008 at 7:49 pm

    No worries dear Allison, you’ll do fine. I can’t wait to hear more about pride! I’m always scared to try new things, but then once it starts the rush pushes me further to do whatever I need to. Oh I wanted to let you know that I’m going to take some Musical theatre classes! I’m so excited! I love acting and you’re my idol! Again you’ll do fine with teh directing your such a talented young girl who will proove to everyone that Miss Mack is a true director! I’ll post in tommorow, much love and support, Brittany

  • Bouroux

    on August 3, 2008 at 8:53 pm

    Hi Allison.
    Good Luck directing Allison.
    You are not alone in this project. You will be with an amazing team that you know since 7 years. It’s your second family. Your interpretation of Chloe since the past 7 years we have to show that you have the instinct of directing in you. Now you have to judge others and not just you. Judging the work of others when it comes to friend is intimidating. you know the capabilities of other actors. You simply must help them exploit their potential.The idea of trying must be a source of pride. Believe in yourself, do not hesitate to consult and especially do it with joy.
    Have a good night.
    Bye
    Claude

  • Maria

    on August 4, 2008 at 9:38 am

    VERY COOL! I love the site!!

    Well, Pride. What can I say about pride? Honestly, I’m scared of it. I’ve heard so much bad things about pride. Kings,governors,presidents, who are so proud of themselves that they destroy their countries in half to make them feel more proud. Because unfortunately some people make pride into power. I guess the best way I can explain this is with a quote i found…

    “Does war bring out the worst in men or does the worst in men bring out war?

    I mean it says it right there. Sometimes pride turns into power. Men wanting more power and they will not stop until they get it. In that way, that’s what scares me of pride. That’s why i try not be that proud and also why I don’t take compliments very well lol. I’ve seen how pride destroys people and changes them. But I’m not saying that being proud of what you do is bad. It’s ok to be able to see things you’ve done and be proud of them of course it is! I am proud of being who I am and with the things I’m slowly accomplishing in this life of course I am!! But we have to be careful in how we use that pride. Because people in this world, some people, mistake it for power. But ,to me, pride = love. Love in what you do and being happy with what you do. To me that is pride, Loving what you do and what you have accomplished while still loving yourself.

    I hope I explained myself! lol

    XoXo

    Maria

  • paul

    on August 5, 2008 at 4:45 pm

    It’s paradoxical that pride often goes hand in hand with low self-esteem; to be seen publicly failing can be devastating to someone with a dicey sense of self worth. Someone with an unshakable sense of self worth can laugh off failure.

    Of course, someone with an unshakable sense of self worth will also have an ego the size of a planet. This generally makes them a colossal pain to be around!

  • Daisy

    on August 6, 2008 at 5:35 pm

    I can’t wait to hear about your directing experience. I really wanted you to direct an episode from last season but then the writer’s strike occured but now you’ve got another chance. I’m sure you’ll do fine just like your other castmates have. You can do it Allison. We believe in you!

  • pandi merdeka

    on August 20, 2008 at 8:38 pm

    🙂 uhmm came by to say hi again 😉

  • Diana

    on August 20, 2008 at 8:42 pm

    I was in the 6th grade when my friends and I decided to write poems about 9/11 and there will be a couple more similar to this one.

    Red, white, and bluestill stand proud,
    though towers fell and planes roared loud.

    As the firemen rushed out

    withsafe people in their arms,

    a sense went out around the nation

    that we were free from harm.

    We stopped evil in it’s path

    and showed our country was still strong.

    No more devils welcome here

    whose minds are clouded with wrong.

    Our eagle still glides us proud in flight,

    with joy in his heart and wings packed with might.

    The stars and the stripes continue to shimmer,

    whilethe Tali Ban’s future

    grows grimmer and dimmer.

    They’ve learned that messing with us

    is a big mistake, because our pride is real

    and our boldness isn’t fake.

    Now I join the nation in saying,

    “We’re One Great Country,

    And that’s How We’re Staying!”

    I hope you liked it, it’s my American PRIDE, lol